U know what i think?

O.O

I don't really care about what people use their blogs for, but the income they get(if they make it a business) is quite tempting.
As for me, i treat this blog as a trash can. A place to dump all my stuff that i can't tell other people or stuff that would just burden their minds if they were to try and rationalize and then conjure up a neat conclusion, in addition to a whole new set of advices which keep ringing the same tone as ones i heard before.

Current mode = I don't know what to do(besides the obvious -> studying), And I'm caught up in stuff i don't even remember getting into, or even worse, i don't know what they are.
So here i am, dumping my rubbish, on my blog... For my poor readers to read(if there were any, hopefully none cause' it makes me look pathetic ha-ha).
Jammed with thoughts, desires, and regrets, it is hard to focus and get things right. Thankfully, I've got my own type of cigarettes to deal with this. A pack full of DotA and on-and-off futsal games which wears me out physically, allowing me to forget my mental disturbances.

I just wished, for once, i would get my original drive back. The one that got me started on this path. Without a drive, this keeps feeling like a job that has to be done for the sake of doing it. The process becomes impossible to enjoy, the results fail to satisfy not only the person assessing it, but also the person doing the job. If i could sleep now, and wake up knowing that i have something to do, and my soul filled with passion in doing it, life in campus would be so much more lively. Instead, I'm stuck finding stuff to do to cover-up the boredom.

The more this feeling of emptiness remains, i am fearing that even the drama's using foreign languages will not be enough to suffice for my lack of activities. I know this can't continue, it would be very dangerous to my pointer, but what can i do? What is there to do when the root of the problem is not known? Or maybe the problem is known, but there ain't nothing in the world that you/I can do to solve it?

There you go. Tonight's rant about what i think about whatever that is on my mind but not a single focused theme. Or maybe the theme is myself? Who knows.

Trouble...

Trouble is not a friend.
Damn that song from Lenka, nobody wants trouble as a friend.

I might be talking out of my way here, but its my blog, so I'll blab about what i want.
Ha-ha.
At first i thought it was going to be a long time. Really.
But then, time flew by me.
I was thrown right into the real deal!
UG!
Still time flew faster than i could shout," Oi, i haven't finished studying yet!".
There goes my first semester in UG. Three more years left.

Holidays, ah, got to spend precious time with my "dear".
Had the time of my life with her too.
Hoping a lot that there's more to come, but only time will tell.
But apart from that, trouble came along...
Like i said, i don't like trouble, that's why I'm not friends with him/her/it/whatever in the first place.
Financial crunch(not that serious but enough to be troubled.)
Family Misunderstanding(kinda left a hard-to-go-away stain.)
Distance(why the hell must studying have to be away from home.)
InnerSelf(the Force is troubling in me...)
etc...(I'm not being dramatic or anything, just pouring some badass water before i get corrupted.)

But I trust that I will be able to see this true. Life is like this, so i will start to shut up.
Ha-ha.
It could have been worse, so this is the end of my complaining, and the start of my working.

And if "you"re reading this, i will try my best, as a 18-year old student, to rearrange my priorities, and "you"re gonna be way up in the list.

Inspired Me...

Yeah, we live with regrets...
Regrets make a big part of our lives...
How stupid were we when we did/didn't do what we would regret...

That, up there, goes to me!
Do you ever say to yourself, "Sayang oh sa tida buat macam tu",
"If I only i did something", and so on with other quotes of regrets,
all saying the same damn thing...

THINGS COULD HAVE BEEN DIFFERENT
IT WOULDN'T HAVE TO BE LIKE THIS

But I'm done thinking about my regrets up to now.
Yang sudah, akan "stay" sudah.
Yang baru akan datang.
New stuff coming my way, so goodbye regrets,
hello new opportunities and challenges,
and i'll always be reminded, i will have the time of my life.

p.s. feel like mixing up the languages a little.
inspired by Adventureland and Time of Your Life.