So long was it since i posted anything. No reasons, i don't know why.
Its been a rough time lately, or rather, these few months.
Haven't been doing what a student should be doing, and have been doing stuff student's should not.
The details, well, just to keep it simple; it ain't pretty.
This blog will soon become a trashcan of thoughts and regrets, hopes and failures, and stuff like that.
I just can't find another way to take these things of my mind, so hopefully, this might work.
To make things clearer, for me, cause' i wanna read this later after i post it, i will start of with a story.
Once upon a time, this boy like this girl. This girl was perfect for the boy(so it seemed) so the boy was head over heels for this girl. Unfortunately, by the ever so random choice of fate, this girl only wanted the boy as kawan. But the boy don't want that, and after certain human mistakes, the boy decided to completely ignore the girl. Well, after a while, the girl was sad(so she said) cause her kawanboy is not her kawan anymore. But the boy began to see that he was being selfish and stupid, so he maafkan her, and invited her to his birthday. The boy still has that present she gave him until now (using it i may add). But after secondary, the boy and girl began to drift apart, so the boy go and try to close the gap before the girl went overseas. He still kept in touch with her when she was in a land far far away. It seemed like they were closer than ever before, only that it "seemed' that way, unfortunately not. So this girl got together with a boy who is a friend of the kawanboy, and the same human mistake happened again, causing a more severe ignorance complex. After all that happened between the girl and her kawanboy, the kawanboy will surely have a major hard time to get things together. So the kawanboy stupidly got together with a different girl he liked. The kawanboy decided that time will make him fall for this girl. It at first seemed that way, the kawanboy liked this girl very much, and would do many things for her, even stuff that would get him in serious trouble with his parents if he were found out. But the kawanboy started to realize, the way the relationship was working, he would keep getting disappointed and depressed. This was because everything the kawanboy does for this girl, it was only tearing him and the girl apart. Another point to add was that the parents of the kawanboy, were strict about dating. So the kawanboy had to lie each time, and this didn't make anything better. And the kawanboy started to mistreat the girl, and make her feel bad, and although he realized it, he didn't have the guts to keep up. He did try to make her feel better, it wasn't hard to do, but still, he could not do it. From liking to duty, he knew what had become of this thing he had with the girl. So he had to do the hardest thing. He had to become the bad guy. Well, considering the facts, the kawanboy was a badguy, so the kawanboy did it anyway. *break*
The irony is that the kawanboy misses the girl very much but knows that the girl will be angry, and things will not be the same, but he did it because he cares for her. He knows and hopes that there is another boy out there that can give her what he could not because she deserves much more. *the end*
Okay, end of story, and from what i have learned, friends are always friends, if you cross the line, it's gonna take a huge U-turn to get back. And also, there is more to doing the right thing than doing it just for self gain.
This is the first time i ever told this story, and to be frank, i'm quite embarrassed by just typing it. But then again, i like to keep stuff to myself, and i don't have a freakin' diary, so i'll just post it here where nobody reads it. I'm not emotional or depressed, i just have a lot in mind, and i've got study week ahead, so my mind works best empty, or not full.
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